How the Doomsday will ring in

With the bat-crap crazy talks going around about the world ending on the coming Friday, I have tried to analyze the 5 best case Doomsday scenarios -

1.       Alien Invasion – For all we know, the Mayans received an inter-galactic memo, stating that the planet was about to be wiped clean come December 21 2012. Pretty sure the Mayans are sitting somewhere, with smug smiles on their faces as we get zapped to dust. Heck, it’s even possible that the civilization was obliterated by the said aliens’ last visit whilst in the process of t working out the calendar, thus bringing their writing adventures to a halt. Kind of Mass Effect style, only less galactic fireworks.

You could buy a tin foil hat to prevent the aliens from hijacking the brains. Seriously, best way to survive if the earth is under siege. Moreover, the Hollywood movies have taught us that the Aliens’ Interest territory remains the United States (Remember “Independence Day”). No way are they coming to the Eastern Hemisphere. Even, if they decide to cross the Atlantic, London would be attacked next. We are safe.

1. 2.       Asteroid or Meteor Impact – Remember the movie “Deep Impact” or “Armageddon”? In case you don’t, well, humanity discovers (just in the nick of time) that a giant mass of weird rock is hurling towards earth at cataclysmic speed. Impact with the planet would definitely result in the extinction of life. This is a very likely scenario, especially given that it was what most likely caused the extinction of dinosaurs. If only dinosaurs had the technology we have today, they’d still be alive and we would know, how the dino-meat tastes like. Statistically, the earth is being bombarded with these meteor fragments on an hourly basis. They burn up in the atmosphere, we just don’t see them. However, every 100 million years or so, comes a giant asteroid with thousands of kilometers of radius, capable enough to really wipe out the life from our planet. The Chicxulub crater in the Yucatan Peninsula is the largest known crater impact, probably from the asteroid whose impact wiped out the dinosaurs.

Surviving an asteroid impact ranges from “pretty easy” to “impossible”. Why it may not happen? One word answer – Science !! We have enough technology to spot any object years before it comes within any destructive distance of our atmosphere. As we are aware of, meteors and asteroids have not leant the art of sneaking up on planets.

1. 3.       Nuclear War – World peace has become the punch line for fancy speeches to win hearts and votes. While a few individual still strive tirelessly for a nuclear weapon free plant, nations perpetuate fear among its citizens, justifying the ever increasing stockpile of nuclear arsenal. We are talking not just about the atom bombs, but hydrogen bombs too. Currently, there is a stockpile of about 20000 nuclear warheads, sufficient to wipe out our planet several times over. Surface to air detonation would cause a radiation-fallout that would span for centuries, not to mention, nuclear winter. Maybe we would have mutant super-powers.

Surviving a nuclear war can be pretty tricky, almost bordering on the impossible. Even if we survive the bombings, there’s always radiation fallout to worry about. Soon, we’d be seeing mutations in humans too. And, no nothing like “Ninja-Turtles”, but something like “The Hills Have Eyes”

I am pretty sure, that we don’t need any specific date to blow ourselves over. We have had enough nuclear arsenal for years, and it doesn’t need someone egoistic or nervous to trigger a button, that would initiate a nuclear war which would probably be the Third and the Last World War.

1. 4.       Polar Ice Dissipation – Blame this one on the global warming. We have already noted that the planet is getting pretty hot. Global surface temperatures have risen by about a degree over the last two centuries and while that doesn’t seem like much in figures we’re all aware of how it is effecting the weather. Summers have become hotter and winters colder, the timelines for weather has become totally skewed and we’re seeing more natural disasters happen now than ever. However, one aspect we’re missing out is dissipating polar ice caps. Environment activists are busy ranting about polar bears losing their habitat, but I am not concerned with that. Well, now, the polar caps are melting significantly and water level is rising.

Learn to surf, stock up on tons of summer and winter clothing that would be accessible at an instant’s notice. Make all your belonging floatable. But, a major chunk of the polar ice caps is still frozen. So, unless there is a massive heat ray unleashed by a villain, the ice caps are not melting any time soon to fulfill the “Mayan” prophecy.

1. 5.       Mini Black Hole – Well, let us talk about serious stuff now, stuff that is real. Heard about CERN? They are a European organization whose sole job is to operate the LHC. The LHC is essentially a large tube through which particles are accelerated up to a speed touching the speed of light, before making them collide. Scientists hope that in this collision, which results in an exotic spray of particles, they might find the Higgs Boson particle. Also known as the God particle which would help proving the String Theory and thus give us an underlying Unifying Theory of Universe. The problem might arise when proton-proton collision could theoretically create microscopic black holes. Scientists say these black holes will disappear instantaneously. But what if they don’t? Then there is a bunch of crazy scientists who are trying to create black holes in their laboratories for years.

Well, first tackling the concerns with the LHC experiments, the scientists at CERN and many other research laboratories across the world have said that a microscopic black hole would dissipate much faster that it could absorb anything. If they are wrong, just hope that you get your favorite Pasta/Pizza while we are being absorbed by the Black Hole and might emerge through a White Hole or a Worm Hole.

Else, grab a big tub of popcorn and laugh while the people go crazy on Facebook /Twitter on 21^st December 2012.

Inspired from "Discovey Channel" and "Digit"